Saturday, 25 June 2011

The dynamic double delusion of dualism

Here is a discussion I had with an analytical philosopher. Well I say discussion, he reported me to the moderators and got me banned. I was flaming him but that is how to get people locked in to a dialogue. I guess rather than explain the holes in what he was saying and actually face the fact that he had spewed some very outlandish claims with no basis to back them up, he chose to make it disappear.

People don't like being proved to be wrong, of course there is an evolutionary function for this. However, there is a lot of common misconceptions that people cling to and I want to really highlight these as that is the purpose of this post.

(Note: The original transcript is coloured.)

I disagree. Experience is a predication of a subject. There must be a thing that is experiencing experience for experience to exist. You saying that experience itself exists is the same as someone who is arguing that 'red' itself exists. But 'red' is not a thing, it is a property that things have (an attribute).”

No there is just experience. You are simply contradicting yourself here. You are using exactly the same argument for a self to exist and a presupposition. Look.

There is the experience of an object perceived as red object but red itself is a conceptual label for the attributes of red.

There is experience of what exists but self is a conceptual label for the attributes of experience. That is all self is; a concept = a thought. Its not a thing it has no properties.”

So here I am saying that self is a conceptual label for the attributes of reality. Now this does sound strange on the face of it. How can self be a label for the attributes of experience?

Well lets start off by looking at what he said off the bat.

Experience is a predication of a subject”
Actually experience is a predication of existence. Without existence there is no experience and vice versa. The two are inextricably linked, you can not have one without the other. There has to be a subject to experience existence, that subject is a human being, a lizard or whatever thing you wish to insert in to the equation.

“I” refers to a physical body as there is no self, therefore we still have a subject existing which is necessary for experiencing existence.

We can take this one thing as true from our direct experience of reality. The one thing we know for certain is that there is a body sitting right here right now reading this. That we can be sure of. The body exists, the computer and everything in the room exists. Thought exists, feelings exist, it is all very real.

There must be a thing that is experiencing experience for experience to exist.”

So we have already outlined that there is a human body that is experiencing existence. We are now inserting this idea of a self in to the equation. Now here is where it gets interesting.

There can only be experience of existence.

How do you layer on another level of experience on top of experience itself? We can boil it down to there is experience of existence and that is as far as we can go.

The statement is misleading but in a logical capacity it sounds as though there is truth in it, so lets pick it apart. Reality usurps everything. If it is not in reality, it does not exist. There is existence of what is contained within reality and there is only the direct experience of what exists.

By virtue of his proposition here, it implies that there is something separate from experience, for experience to exist.

How can anything be separate from experience of existence? It would not exist.

This argument is now logically invalid but to show you how this would work, we can look in to the atomic realm.

Take an atom, what is its direct experience? It is subject to the strong nuclear force holding the nucleus together, It has electrons whizzing round it and it is attracted to other atoms to form stable configurations... molecules. It is subject to fluctuations in heat, energy, and even pressure. Imagine that as there is >99% of nothing in an atomic structure, the electron cloud may undergo compression as it is packed in to a dense space or has force exerted on it.

We know the argument where nothing actually touches, there is just repulsion. That is an atoms experience, which is never static. Now would the atom be experiencing the experience of this? Or would it be more precise to say that the atoms experience is dictated by existence.

Existence itself is the experience of the atom. On an atomic level there is no separation from experience or existence. An atoms direct experience, is of what exists in reality. Since we are made from matter, essentially the only way there can be any separation is by invoking this idea of dualism.

The proposition of experiencing experience itself, does not make any sense for starters but we can provide an analogy of what he is trying to say by looking at virtual reality. So when you are hooked up inside the VR world matrix style, we can look at the qualities of that experience.

Are you experiencing the experience of the virtual world, or are you in fact experiencing existence still?

The virtual world exists inside reality, there is no division in reality, it is contained within reality, or else it would not exist. It is a virtual world but it is a computerised manifestation that exists within reality. Inside the computer there are transistors and electricity running through the circuit boards. Code is being executed by the CPU, which is manifested as a computer world, through the VR feed.

This becomes the direct experience of existence, to the organism in the machine. However, this virtual world is a “mesa – reality”, contained inside of reality. We can take mesa - reality to simply mean the confines of which the organism is subject to.

 I.E a mesa - reality is one where an organism, is experiencing a limited segment of the totality of reality. They are unaware of what the full scope of reality is but they are experiencing existence, within these limited confines.

You can not be experiencing the experience of virtual reality, you are experiencing a facet of existence through a computer that manifests this virtual world. Now you can say that you are having the experience of virtual reality because you are separate from virtual reality but...

Virtual reality exists within reality and so do you. Everything exists inside of reality and you can not be separate from reality. If it did not exist in reality it would not exist, it is that simple.

There is no separation from experience or existence.

You could label it as a mesa – reality if you wanted to, because if someone was born and hooked up to this VR machine from birth and fed intravenously, then conceivably it would become the experience of existence for that particular organism.

However, mesa - reality is simply my term for a set of imposed limitations that prevents the organism from experiencing every attribute of existence in this particular instance. The mesa - reality does not actually exist because reality can not be divided at all. Mesa - reality is merely a conceptual label for the experience of this confined existence, that the organism was hooked in to since it was born.

There is a thought experiment where David Chalmers used the matrix metaphor to come to this conclusion.

“Consider a computer simulation in which the bodies of the creatures are controlled by their minds and the minds remain strictly external to the simulation. The creatures can do all the science they want in the world, but they will never be able to figure out where their minds are, for they do not exist in their observable universe”.

Here he has tried to use a mesa – reality to explain why we can not know where our minds are.

Whilst this is logically valid, this assumes that the duality has a physical property, or is commonly known as substance dualism. The only problem this has, is the fact that reality has to be divided in to a mesa reality. We are aware of the universe and what exists in the material world. For this line of thinking to be correct then we have to create a meta – reality, outside of our reality or accept that we are actually in a mesa - reality.

Now string theory indicates there are 6 – 7 dimensions that we are unaware of at present.

So you could argue that we are only aware of a mesa - reality but at no point can there actually be a division in reality. There can be certain facets that we are unaware of but then we would still be experiencing a limited section of reality, with only what we can perceive forming the constraints of our mesa – reality.

Mesa and meta – realities, are not real divisions in any way, they are simply a conceptual labelling for any apparent constraints in our perception. So whilst we could argue that there is a self beyond what we are aware of, if we actually take the time to look in reality we can see that this in fact totally false.

There is no you in real life. Actually have a look at this and see if there is any truth in the statement... We can argue about this all day and get nowhere but if you actually took the time to look in real life at what is true, then you would be able to see this as the truth. There is thought that occurs, there does not need to be an entity controlling it, life actually lives itself, it always has done.

Just look at this one thing; is there a you?

Whilst the argument is logically valid here, we can know by observing reality directly, that the self is totally illusory. For all the noise that anyone can make about logical arguments, we can simply prove this by looking in real life.

The self is false, it is completely illusory, you are only a thought. Yes it is logically possible for substance dualism but it does not prove in anyway that it is real. The whole non duality thing is real, there is no separation from experience or existence, you can prove it for yourself by actually looking in real life.

So you can make an informed choice here about which is more likely:
a) There is some magical spirit or transcendental soul that inhabits every human body, that is separate or exists beyond our reality.

b) The self is an illusory construct of thought that was necessary in evolution but actually causes thought to feedback in to itself, which can give rise to anxiety and depression in some cases.

Before you choose, use occams razor...

Take a feral child for instance, its mesa - reality is within the confines of being a pack animal. It can experience existence but that is it. There is no separation from experience and existence. The feral child IS directly experiencing existence. Its experience is limited to pack animals behaviour. Interestingly enough, if there was actually a self, then how would this self be hampered in its development? By virtue alone this process demonstrates that “you” can only be what you think you are and if self can only be what you can conceive it is, then self must only be a thought.
Then who is doing the conceiving? No one is, its the brain.
You could say that the child's experience is of the animals life and the experiencing of that mesa - reality indicates there is a quality to it that can be experienced but reality usurps everything, there can only be experience of what exists. There is no division between experience and existence.

So now we are ready for this:
You saying that experience itself exists is the same as someone who is arguing that 'red' itself exists. But 'red' is not a thing, it is a property that things have (an attribute).”

Experience and existence are not mutually exclusive, they are one and the same. You can not have one without the other. It would be easier for us to say what can be perceived is direct experience of existence.

The OP actually only said “there is experience” but our friend here took it to mean it as an argument for a physical thing.
There is thought, feeling, incoming sense data and there is the direct experience of these things. That is all. There is only an illusionary reference to “I”.

Because of the chunk level programming of the brain, we have thought patterns. Through the “I” function, the brain labelled a false entity responsible for the generation of thought patterns. Tests show that any control you think you have is illusory. You can do these tests on the experiement pages here.

In fact what is happening is the body takes action and the corresponding thoughts are generated afterwards. Therefore self is a label for the properties of experience. Self is actually a belief, it is only a subjective map of reality.

We can experience the thought of “I” but it is not a real thing, it is a conceptual label and only a falsely perceived attribute of experience, caused by the brain being conditioned to believe it is real.

Since self does not exist, it is literally only a manifestation of thought. It has no properties other than a subjective label.

Much like the water in a mirage is perceived, it is not real and has no influence over reality, save those that believe the illusion is real.

Might sound far fetched but what if it was actually true in real life?
There is no you, you are an illusion. Actually have a L@@K in to this and see if there could be any truth in this statement.

There must be an underlying thing for enlightenment to be achieved. Enlightenment is a state of being; it is understanding. There must be some being that exists to have a state of being. The state itself is not a being”.
No enlightenment is not a state of being. It is not a state of being or else that would require a shift in the brains neuro – chemistry. A state of being is emotional and feeling. It is called a state because in that snapshot of time, there is a configuration of chemicals being on specific receptors and the corresponding nerve impulses. These things are goverened by the brains biochemistry, that is transient in itself.
There does not have to be a self to have understanding there is only the brain understanding. There is a being that exists, a human one. The state of being occurs within the human being. To “have” a state of being means to be separate from the human being, how can that be? You have created a dichotomy. How can you be separate from the human body to own the experience of it?”

In particular this section demonstrates a common misconception that people have about enlightenment. First of all, enlightenment is not a state of being, it is truth realisation. When we talk about a state of being, we are talking about an objective state. In any given snapshot of time, state refers to a physical configuration.

Now if a human being could reach an enlightened state, that would mean that there would be some kind of special configuration such as a change in neuro - chemistry. This obviously is not true. There is just direct experience of existence that is not filtered through an illusory entity of self.

That opens up the real clarity of seeing that liberated people have. It is not cosmic understanding, it is simply the lenses that blur reality are removed and there is clear seeing of what IS.

I'm not a brain; brains aren't conscious temporal things like me, but they're material spatial things that 'exist' when they are perceived by conscious temporal things. This doesn't mean that brains don't exist in time, but they don't exist in time like I exist in time”.

So you are saying that the brain is not conscious? Here you are trying to say that the brain exists when it is perceived by you “ a conscious temporal thing”. How do you propose that you are separate from the brain? Would you have to exist outside of reality to interact from outside of the brain or would there be some kind of special division in reality for you to exist? You are talking absolute retarded shit here pal.
So how do you propose a brain exists in time, in any different way that you do?
I mean listen to yourself, you claim you are separate from the brain and your body and you claim that you don't even exist in time in the same way that it does?
WTF are you talking about you moron?
To be this, you would have to be outside of reality, how exactly do you propose this is possible?”

Here we have a classic delusion of what level the self operates on. As we know in order to have thought, you have to be separate from it. I can not have ice cream if I am ice cream.

There is a human being that experiences existence, that is as far as we can boil it down. To have thought or experience means to be separate from.

If this is the case where exactly are you then?

Which part of the brain is called self?

Would you have to be separate from the experience of existence to “have” thought?

Thought occurs within the human body, there is no separation from existence or experience. To “have” thought means to be separate from it. There is experience of existence, thought feelings and the sense data naturally occur within existence, there is no separation from this, it is logically impossible.

In this particular case the guy thinks he is separate from the brain but this is quite a common misconception and many people believe this until they actually begin to analyse what is happening in real life.

I may have material causes to my existence, but my existence is not purely a process because I have temporality”.

No you don't have temporality because there is just the impermanent nature of reality.
How can you own the impermanent nature of reality, how can you actually “have” temporality, that would mean you were separate from the temporality.
And what are the material causes to your existence then, what is the single thing that causes experience?”

Here again we have this magical thinking that many are unaware of. When we think in terms of “we have” it implies necessarily that we are separate from it. In this case the guy here thinks he is separate from temporality. It is so simple really, because we view everything through a separate sense of self it totally seems logical to say we have arms and legs.

 This is because there is the illusion of duality, the perceived nature of a self being responsible for the thought and actions that arise. To put it simply, as we are conditioned to this dualistic world view, it is none sensical to say that we don't have arms and legs. However, language is naturally dualistic in nature. There are arms and legs on a human being but they are not your arms and legs, there is no separate entity to do the owning.

 Many people have written about this topic so I shall leave it be for now but if you are not convinced then look and see if it is actually true; there is no you in real life, you are an illusion.

My existence is not passive receiving the word, but I actively participate in the world as time flows”.

Time is an illusory concept, much like your argument for the red being an actual thing. Yes there is the ever changing nature of reality, we have merely made a concept up about it we called time. It is a useful thing and we should keep it but it is a conception. Nothing exists outside of the present moment.
You do not actively or passively participate in the world because there is no you in real life, LOOK. Life lives itself it always has done.”

Makes sense really, there must be an entity actively participating in the world. There is. A human being. The human being exists, you and the self image that has been constructed is an illusory fantasy to put it simply.

The human interacts with the world and as it goes about its business of survival and replication, it generates corresponding thoughts that un - liberated people believe reference a real entity.


Quite simply you do not exist in any way shape or form, you never did, “you” is a thought, nothing more. Post liberation not a lot changes, there is still thought, things are the same but there is no attachment to outcome, and negative thoughts no longer spiral out of control. You have the freedom to live life with the full range of human experience, not get overwhelmed and have a degree of serenity of being. It requires NO belief whatsoever, in fact it is the opposite of belief. It is questioning what is really true in reality, so take this opportunity now to actually investigate what is real, that is my challenge to you.

Undertake an assessment of what you thought was true by starting to build up your conceptions from the ground up. Yes, this takes effort, courage and honesty. That is a small price to pay for the clear seeing and truth realisation; there is no you, you are an illusion. You can argue with me all day about this but.... but.... How about actually doing the looking required to see if it could be true.

All you have to do to disprove it, is actually look at it honestly. If you can do that and prove it wrong, then you will save me a great deal of time and effort. I have written hundred of thousands of words since I was liberated (not all on here) if not over a million. I would like to be able to zen out in peace but while the world is fucking itself up, I can not stand aside and watch. Take it on, see what is real, do the numbers and see if it figures, then actually see the truth in it; there is no “you”.

And finally:

Either way, the argument in the OP is a terrible argument”.

Then what is your argument? A total delusion. There is nothing in your argument that has a single shred of truth in it. Look at the dog shit that you have spewed here, it is absolute nonsense drivel”.

Enough said for now, so yeah have a look. Could it be true?

Thursday, 23 June 2011

Touching the void, homemade anxiety and looking at... nothing

Only kept this for posterity's sake as it was an account of when I was working abroad as an English teacher to start with. I had just read the book 'Prometheus Rising' and my analysis of anxiety was done in terms of that. 
Hence why it is nonsensical ramblings at the end unless you have read the book. Anyways, I had just discovered the formless realm, aka 'the void', during meditation and I believed this was a major discovery at the time. Whilst it is written in the Buddhist literature it is important not to revere it as I did to start with. 
There is little of value here for any investigator, however, the story about my stalker is chronicled here, so that is the reason this post has not been deleted! - Gh0$T 2014 

Hey all, been busy as fook with work but banged out half a years syllabus and shit loads of lessons despite having tonsillitis and phalingitis straight after. It is in remission thankfully after 3 weeks of antibiotics, so looks like I can cruise for a while at least. That is if I have not got a dose of measles coming on, which I think I may have eek!

Can't post comments on blogger either for some reason, still on 56k modem but think its to do with cookies and connection speed. Who knows...

I wanted to post my findings on the void. Only really glanced the surface of it at first but could clearly see the use in it. My take is that when looking at the void, you get smashed with an uber - dose of honesty. Now the thing is with depression it is always built on negative core beliefs that get reactivated at some point. Its normal to feel down sometimes but depression is a chemical state change in the brain that is triggered by dissonance and the activation of these beliefs.

Literally depression is a feedback loop caused by thought and the body responds by changing its chemical configuration temporarily. We already know this but I originally thought that liberation was the cure for it. I really did think it was THE cure for psychosomatic depression. Since I have been liberated, I have not had any depression or anxiety. I have been down a few times but not in the same way. Still there is the feedback there though in some capacity and I did think, it was just residual.

I think a few people mentioned that they could just palm it off by thinking there is no me and that seems like a denial to me in some ways but I found myself doing exactly that at times when required. It works in a limited capacity and it was very useful for dealing with issues before they have a chance to snowball.

So I took this opportunity to experiment. I tried to build up anxiety (more difficult than it sounds) to levels where I felt very uncomfortable and started to feel negative. I have had a lot of health problems of late, with two throat infections, working very hard and straining my voice when teaching. I am still being plagued by a stalker and my ex missus is still hounding me.

There is a bit of a cold war going on between them all, I have no contact with my ex's husband but between the people here and myself, there has just been an ongoing facade that has lasted for around six months. I am fucking sick of it but I still have three months left on my contract, I just want to get it done, get my reference and then I will hang here for a month or so to work on a book and then get my arse back to blighty all being good.

The stalking business is not funny, I am dealing with a bona - fide psychopath. BTW this is not a cry for help but I am trying to give you the background to the anxiety state I managed to achieve. Any ways this woman is mentally ill, I have sent her texts telling her to go and kill her self and she is still after all this time asking me out to dinner. She has been spying on me outside my house and all sorts of wierd shit. All she ever talks about is how great I am and how she is going to marry me one day.

I hear this off her friend who was my ex. Despite her shitting on her family and her friend to be with me, they are still friends. Inexplicable really but they are not even really friends, it is just a surface level mutual companionship agreement. Any ways cut a long story short a while ago I handed in my notice and the school actually gave me a new office in the building the opposite end of the school, to convince me to stay. The director of the school warned them to stay away from me and as the school holiday was 2 months, it was plain sailing and I was able to focus a lot of energy in to liberating people.

Since term has started I have been hammered by my workload and my stalker is my co teacher for three lessons on a Friday and that is the only contact I have with her. Before this last weekend she started telling me how my ex was happy now we were separated and how she had a nice happy family now I was out of the loop. I actually ditched her but yeah I am still hurting over it. It was plain to see that she was actually trying to sink a knife in to me but she is so deluded she can not even see what a vile person she is being.

She then started to sing a Ricky Nelson song to me. The song is called poor little fool. It is about a guy who falls in love with a girl who was playing him like a poor little fool. This was rather in the serial killer ilk and I felt my hackles rise but I did not bite and laughed it off. After lunch she had downloaded it on to her phone and played it to me and then played it again. Yeah, I was pretty seething, it pushed my buttons but instead I just turned round and told her that she was actually insane.

I said “Look honestly at what you are doing, just actually take a look at what you are doing in real life now”.
"You are a vile disgusting human being, I meant everything I said, I have no respect for you what so ever, you are a crazy old hag, you are actually insane, you need professional help".
This was a spectacular fail on my part. I had her set her up as her qualifying herself to me and then she started to talk about going for lunch next week. She started trying to lend me her laptop which I have no need for and I had her to shove it in to her arms and bundle her out of the door.

I told my boss about it, I told her that she had to stay away from me but the fucked up thing is, she has told the staff at the school that she is only trying to look after me and that she does not fancy me. Well she has already admitted that she does and its plain to see that she is still obsessed. Obviously as I am a foreigner, they think its me who is looking in to things too much. No. She is genuinely nuts, I have had nothing but problems, she seems to think that "I must feel the pain of heartbreak to truly know what love is" quote from a text message. She also threatened to grass me up to the immigration bureau for working here illegally indirectly.

Hence, I have had to be semi polite to her when I see her in school but ignore any text messages or phone calls that I receive from her. The whole thing is a stupid charade and to top it all off, I have problems with the other teachers at the school. There is the language barrier here but I have fallen out of favour with people of late as I have been ill for 2 months and have not really made the effort or talk to anyone or made any effort to get involved with extra curricular activities at the school since we started back.

I also bailed on a teachers outing when I was first struck with this illness and people took it as me being ignorant but in actual fact why the fuck would I want to go on holiday with a bunch of people who hardly speak English. But fuck... I am working my arse off here and after teaching with a sore throat, I am never in the mood for pleasantries any more.

I have had a unique post liberation experience in that, I am not able to converse with many people directly because of the language barrier and whilst that foul stench of rotten fish (ego) comes up now and again, I think I have been pretty free from the toxicity that I would likely be to encounter in other people, when thinking about going home to blighty. Being exposed to that foul self serving culture that I left behind 3 and a half years ago will shock me I think. There again it reeks over here too, most people are very plastic and false here (very Thai) so, I think the difference will be seeing it in the people I have known and loved for all this time, that will have the greatest impact on me.

Other unique post liberation factors are my job. Being a foreign teacher is quite hard work at times but since liberation I tend to just regularly fall in the zone whilst teaching. However, it is easy to get attached to the ego role again just because this environment facilitates it well. I often get home and realise that there is actually no me, which always cheers me up. I'm looking forward to trying to get in the void more often while I am focussed intently on tasks.

Anyways sorry for waffling but this is background shit as I say.
I get home and get a text from the ex telling me she loves me. So I text back saying she is a vile snake blah blah. I get a text from my stalker asking me out to dinner.

Fuck I am lying in bed, I can't swallow, I have high fever, my throat is raw from trying to teach, I am getting hounded by people, I have fallen out with most of the staff by being very aloof and distant from them, my students are lazy and some of them actively resist learning, I have been very ill for two months, mildly ill for 6, I have mild haemorrhoids from eating very spicy food, no girlfriend, no weekend drinking buddy for 40km (luckily my friend started work at a school 2 months ago), the house is getting eaten by termites and I am up to my eyeballs in work. Gold. This has got depression trigger written all over it.

The only thing to do was let it build and not intervene. I woke up miserable as sin and I really felt trapped in this place, really trapped. The hardest part was consciously not intervening in the thought patterns (like I could anyway) but focussing my attention on the negative thoughts themselves. By the next day I was starting to reach the end of my tether. The thoughts started arising about going home and bailing. I started to get critical thoughts about myself but they had no traction, as I know self is false. The thing here was that I was in the feedback loop and I had generated the anxiety but the critical thoughts could not hold any more.

 However the feedback took on some momentum regarding my situation, the stress and the discomfort it has been causing me generally. It did actually to start to run of its own accord, as I have been very lonely the last few weeks and it started to take on a life of its own.

I tried to look at that “the fact that stuff exists thing” that Stephven cracked and that had no effect on me. Last time it was insta - bliss. All the looking at the void did was provide temporary relief but I had done no actual focussing soley on the void for protracted periods. At this point I actually thought fuck. I had tried to make myself depressed and I realised that I actually managed to make myself depressed by not intervening in the thought processes with no self as I usually would.

Now at this point I decided that I had to try and circumvent it, I lost my nerve. I did not want to get to the stage of full depression and induce a full chemical state change. I have been there before and yeah, I do really fear going back there again. So I had managed to build a feedback loop of genuine anxiety however, the part where you get all self critical and go in to full depression, I don't think I could have triggered even if I wanted to now. In that respect it is not fully fledged depression but I had built up a lot of anxiety from my circumstances and was able to let it snowball by not looking at it for what it is.

That is the trouble with trying to create depression, if you don't want to do it, it happens if you are trying it for experimental purposes then there is some kind of forcing required by simply not intervening. In that respect there is a slight false factor but I genuinely had angry self destructive thoughts about throwing in the towel and going home, being alone and feeling overwhelmed.

These were in no way forced, I had let the thought complexes snowball. So in that respect I can categorise this state as intense stress, anger and anxiety, rather than actual depression. I am absolutely convinced that pre - liberation, this would have been a trigger for a depressive state but I was actually able to circumvent this using the void.

I started off with meditating on the void, it is different because you get this extra clear seeing of the false self. I can see the heresy idea clearly, it is very strong and I totally see how people can meditate for three hours a day when they are at this stage "on the path". Is that what they call samadhi? It is very blissful and you just kind of melt in to a blissful state.

Straight away this struck me as being potentially useful as instant relief from depressive symptoms. As some know, depression is a very heavy feeling and it is overwhelming. For a start this is some good ground for being able to step back from the turmoil and look at what is going on. I felt myself going in to the bliss state and then I stepped back to analyse the cognitions that arose.

Fuck me. Now when I say honesty, it is just that clear seeing. There is no choice but to be honest when looking from this angle at what the mind complex is throwing up, because you can not delude yourself about what you are actually witnessing. I think where Ciaran said it is like living with a real fiction is bang on the money. At this point I see what Stephven meant about having his perception inverted.

Literally at first when liberated there is the seeing that this construct is false and that is real. When Ciaran had the character thing, I think it was just a glimpse of this vista. By using the void it actually has the full traction now. I made the Samadhi reference as it actually did feel like a union with one consciousness. I mentioned this when I first saw the void.

Spiritual metaphors aside, I can see why Advaitans talk about true self and false self, there is just the attribution of labels to these two perceived things. You can clearly see the false self that is not "you", they just happened to happen to believe they (true self) emanated from beyond the void. Personally I think we are one consciousness experiencing itself - The universe IS consciousness? 

You get that real space between the perceived problem the mind throws up and this is valuable space for you to do the numbers on the construct. I basically in a half hour session realise that all the anxiety was false and completely smashed it to pieces. I mean seriously, that anxiety I had generated was just smashed in under half an hour and I came out of the meditation feeling light. During the meditation I turned the lance on to the thought complexes and was able to get down to the beliefs that made the thought complexes.

I thought that by going deeper down to the beliefs I could uproot all the layers of BS on top. Remains to be seen if I can destroy the core beliefs but that would be annihilation to some degree. I was able to turn the lance on the core beliefs and it was just literally like the whole anxiety thing was ludicrous. I laughed out loud once I had seen this. I don't know if I was able to shift the core beliefs in any capacity, that remains to be seen but since negative self critical thoughts no longer have any power, I will not easily be able to tell.
The core beliefs have lost traction over me anyway in many ways, so to put it in a quantitive statement is pretty difficult.

I have been on cool down for 3 days now, in order to make sure that no negativity arose again, which it has not. I may also have had the effect of the void and witnessed it truly for the first time but I am convinced this is not the case as I saw it previously but had not really delved in to the guts of it.

Depression relies on self critical thought complexes on the time binding semantic circuit (circuit III) and socio sexual circuit (circuit IV). [Prometheus Rising – Anton Wilson] These complexes are related to bio survival anxiety and anal territorial (circuits I and II). Whilst these can be witnessed as false, they have the ability to be circumvented once liberated. Simply by witnessing the cognitions driven by circuit I and II programming, it is plain to see how in reality they are just pure fantasy, based on archaic emotional impulses.

Really they are completely archaic circuits, driving cognitions to be produced on circuit III with circuit IV interactions. Now whilst circuits I and II are useful to say a lizard, they tend to just screw us up and cause problems despite the good intentions they were designed for originally and the useful purpose they still serve.

To a depressed person, circuits I and II drive this anxiety loop and whilst a depressed state can not be broken out of as we are still controlled by this circuitry, we have actually witnessed that there is the ability to turn it round by liberation and this deepening. The conditioning hooked in to circuits I and II is responsible for many problems and still can cause anxiety post liberation albeit its impact is limited and thought complexes can now be completely neutered by the looks of it. In this regard it looks like some degree of meta – programming (as in the organism itself) is being used that would explain this phenomena.

I think that liberation is a precursor to the neurosomatic circuit (circuit V) activation. On witnessing the void it would appear that this is in fact a circuit V activation. I would hypothesise that by committing the heresy of annihilation, it is actually a repeated imprinting of circuit V. I would also argue that as time goes on the more this circuit is used, the more annihilation will occur. In that respect I think the heresy is unavoidable in the long term. Only time will tell but there is further evidence to suggest that other circuits are involved in this process and liberation is an activation of these. I will delve deeper soon in to this but I know circuits I – IV are solid, further circuits start to get meta physical in nature but within the confines of observable experience. I will look in to this soon.

As for overnight cure of depression, no I doubt it but I certainly think that the scope here is for remission and then prevention. This has got to be better than banging back prozac or any other SSRI's.

From my experiment here, I was able to smash through this anxiety and I mean literally blow it to pieces in no time at all and if it is found to be repeatable in all test subjects, then this is a potent tool that can be used to circumvent depression that is psychosomatic and is not based on specific neuro - transmitter deficiencies. More data needs to be amassed but it would appear that thought complexes formed on circuits I and II that cause anxiety can be dismantled easily.

I have been liberated for 6 months now and whilst I have not been depressed for ages, I can see the potency of this tool. Whilst this was not tested on full blown depression, I am certain that this would have been a triggering event pre liberation. Whilst this is only a subjective analysis, I know that I bounced from episode to episode for a long time and now it seems that there is a working power tool in order to really crack the mechanism of suffering. Time will tell but I think this time that this is a solid tool that can potentially cure non neuro - transmitter deficiency type depressive states and dismantle suffering with more scope than we previously had post – liberation.

We need to TEST TEST TEST this and see how it pans out.
Fucking hell, Pfeizer may not like this one!! :)

It also seems that there is further scope for more circumvention of circuit I and II mechanisms. The degree of heresy to be committed may be higher in these cases but maybe a balance can be achieved whereby undesirable patterns are annihilated but desirable ones remain intact.

Further experimentation:
Need to find people who are suffering from depression, liberate them and then test this application and look at the time scales involved in circumventing depression completely from start to finish. People who are suicidal should be avoided for obvious reasons until a pattern emerges.

Discover if people who are schizoid, may well benefit from liberation. This may be dangerous for the test subject but once a stable pattern emerges then it is something worth looking in to.

See if there is in any way a concrete method of dismantling core beliefs completely without the cardinal sin of heresy. This is the baseline of depression, so in being able to disrupt circuit I and II core beliefs quickly, this would be an even more potent tool if it is possible to do so. Circuit III is the construct that should be left alone however, by removing the lynch pins this may cause annihilation attributes.

Find out ways to see if utilising the void can be used to suppress circuit I and II type anxieties on the fly without the annihilation effect occurring.

Try to quantify direct observations of reality in relation to circuit V interactions and the role that circuits VI – VIII are possibly playing in this. Again this is lumped in with “meta – physical” phenomena but it is directly observable and must have a rational explanation.

Sunday, 12 June 2011

Beggaring belief - part VI

Part I Here

Here it is spelled out for you as concisely and plainly as possible. So how do we get to feel great all the time?

The simple answer is, that it is impossible. We can feel content and serene most of the time though, that is possible. Once we stop searching for something to bring us happiness, once we stop investing in to our illusory attachments and once we stop beating ourselves up over these trivial failures that we think of as perceived blocks to our happiness, then we can achieve a degree of peacefulness and break out of this cycle.

So after all this what can I really say apart from this is not ground breaking, nor is it some amazing conception. It is simply me trying to put it in to layman's terms for those that are not yet liberated.

The funny thing is if we remove the self from the equation, we actually breakdown the model at this point.

Whilst it still holds true, we have actually removed the core component of the model, the illusion of self. Since “I am not good enough” actually refers to a fictional reference, what we now observe is that in fact all the attachments are no longer there and the engine that produces the negative thoughts about the fictional entity becomes inert.

Once the self is removed from the equation, the attachment to outcome disappears and when things don't go the way you wanted, there is actually no identification made in the outcome anyway...

It is just accepted for what it is.

What really happens is, there is no entity called self to actually invest in to the equation anymore, no sense of self to be derived from any outcomes. When you realise that it actually is a fictional idea, then it becomes apparent that all the suffering is actually illusory in nature, produced by this engine of dysfunction.

It is not real because there is no entity called you that actually exists in real life. Whilst the mind still produces negative thoughts and the neuro - chemical “punishment”, these are actually a useful tool for an organism and as such are viewed as feedback in existential experience.

Once it is seen that there is no you, the feedback cycle of negative thoughts feeding back in to each other and causing this cognitive dissonance is essentially disrupted. Whilst the thought complexes may begin to form, there is the clear seeing in reality that they are in reference to nothing and as such, these thought complexes no longer are able to gain the momentum they once had.

 Essentially the brain does not have the belief in them, since it is realised that thoughts about the self refer to nothing. There is no you in real life it is an illusion. Any reference in thought to yourself or what something makes you as a person, is simply fantasy.

This is liberation, realising that the thought that occurs in terms of “I” is actually in reference to nothing. This is not denying your own existence, there is a body that is experiencing life, there is still thought but the references in this thought that refer to the illusory self are seen as fallacious.

That does not mean that they stop occurring but there is the clear seeing of reality and the seeing that they are entirely illusory in nature. This is essentially what liberation is all about.

There is no separation from thought or existence, there is no you, there never was.

Now anyone who tells you that enlightenment means being in a total state of ecstasy bliss is full of shit. What they are literally trying to tell you is that you can circumvent this biochemical mechanism. This is of course impossible. It can not be circumvented.

How would you be able to function if your body was telling you that everything was ok when you were not moving towards survival? This makes no sense in terms of our evolutionary survival drive. What they actually have is indifference or equanimity.

In seeing that the self you thought you were is actually false, then that is equivalent to witnessing the illusory nature of conscious thought in reference to this entity called “I”. On seeing this, the brain is still conditioned to think in terms of this fictional reference however, it does not have the same level of gravity as it did before as discussed.

Quite often, the so called enlightened have been de - conditioning themselves for many years before they see this truth, which is the actual core of enlightenment. What happens through something like advaita, is on seeing the truth, a lot of the conditioning has already been broken. People say I no longer have ego but in essence, ego is entirely illusory anyway, it does not exist.

Ego is just the label given to thoughts that reference an illusory entity.

There is no ego but the thoughts can be thought of as being egoistic in nature. So whilst ego is not a real entity, it can be termed as thought in relation to a fictional reference.

If we look back earlier in this post, you could be forgiven for thinking that the body requires a self to function but it is simply not true. All these drives in humans are the culmination of evolutionary design, if this was the case for a self being required, we would have to begin to question whether any other entities have a self. Look at pigeons, they can work out basic puzzles that require cognitive thought.

Does thinking require a self?

Well obviously not or that would most living creatures would have to have a self of some description. Think about a dog, a cow, a horse... they don't have self awareness yet they are driven by their instincts to eat sleep and fuck. Life just lives itself, it always has and always will until you die.

Unfortunately this false construct of self that formed from the “I” function, actually ended up introducing a feedback mechanism in human thought. That is all self really is, a glitch in thought that originated from evolutionary design. Whilst this “I” function is no evolutionary glitch in itself, the lie actually forms an anomaly, as an inhibitory mechanism from within this evolutionary function.

Now we have to stop here as I have ranted on further than I planned but rest assured, we will no doubt be delving in to analysis of this evolutionary function in the near future.

In the meantime this lie has been spelt out for you, so get cracking with the knacking and get looking in reality to break your conditioning and “update” the brains model of reality to what is real. That is all liberation is, the true seeing of what IS in reality. No magic tricks, just what is true.

As a bonus you will break this “I can't ever win” cycle, if you happen to be stuck in it.

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